Job Opening: Mancub

It saddens me, but I knew the day would come. My mancub has left captivity to explore the jungle. I’m happy for him. No, I’m downright proud of him. He’s practically a full grown man now, and I like to think I played some small roll in making him the man he almost is today.

But it leaves a huge gaping void in my life. One that’s going to be so much fun to fill!

So I’m recruiting a new mancub.

Job Responsiblilites: be available for last minute repair calls, road-trip calls, whatever calls. Must be keenly intelligent; must clean-up well.

DESIRED EXPERIENCE: restraint; some general contractor knowledge and application;

DEMONSTRATED SKILLS: intuitive neck rubs; mounting heavy objects on cheap old shotgun apartment walls; stuntdriving; comedic timing; flirting

JOB REQUIREMENTS: must own car and valid driver’s license, must have respectable toolbox, toolbelt preferred; able to life heavy objects; cell phone with lots of minutes on monthly plan; take direction well; know when to give direction well; politically incorrect and not easily offended; must have good old-fashioned manners; can-do attitude.

Submissions accepted until position is filled.

Please leave contact details and feeding requirements in the comment section.


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